Killer Cabbage
by chocolatexloverx16
Summary: Believe it or not, the title is pretty significant in the story xD This oneshot is centered around Tala this time. Kai too, kind of. There is a lot of strange, random, and tricking. Enjoy the randomness! -


_**A/N**__: Hey y'all :D How's it going? This oneshot has been written because I am bored... lol and unmotivated to do something worthwhile._

_Anyway, I do hope people are entertained by it ^-^ The title was inspired by me reading "killer cribbage" wrong... xD It is a part of the following story. A rather large chunk is in flashback mode btw ^-^ Just letting you know..._

_**Dedications**__: I've decided I want to dedicate this to ASlaveToWords, since she's been awesome, plus she loves Tala ;D This is for you love! ^-^_

_**Warnings**__: Occasional use of those words little kids shouldn't use. OOCness for sure. Oh, and someone cool may be a robot. Trickery perhaps... still here? Awesome, let's do this randomness! Lol. I sure hope it's funny! At the very least, you'll say "wtf?" xD I did rofl._

_**Disclaimer**__: Has someone been spreading rumors that I own this? How silly! ... And not true... DX_

_**ENJOY!**__ ^_^_

* * *

"Hey Kai!"

"Yes?"

"Could you make me a sandwich?" The redhead yelled over his shoulder.

The blunette nodded mechanically. "As you wish. The usual?"

"Of course. Thanks Kai."

When Kai goes to the kitchen, Tala thinks back to when Kai showed up on his doorstep.

~**Flashback**~

The doorbell rang. Curious as to who would be at the door at an ungodly hour (it was 5:30 in the morning for crying out loud!), Tala sure felt surprised that Kai was there. "Come in."

He was even more surprised when Kai complied right away; not a trace of his usual assertiveness present.

In fact, Tala noticed that Kai was acting rather mechanical. "Dude, are you ok?"

"Yes." That was all he said. His social reputation matched up at least.

Was that a metallic twang in his voice? Odd...

The redhead did not voice this thought however, because it WAS Kai. It HAD to be. Not even his imposters look this accurate.

As soon as they both were inside, Kai asked a question Tala never heard him ask before:

"Would you like a sandwich?"

This question caught him off guard, understandably of course, but after a moment's hesitation, he said, "Sure. What kind you making?"

"Whichever you want."

Tala grinned, thinking of the deluxe sandwich he always had Spencer make for him. He would've made it himself, but he doesn't know how... plus it'd be too much work to make in his opinion. It's much better to let others prepare this deluxe sandwich in his honor.

So Tala described said sacred sandwich to Kai, who didn't flinch like Spencer did. He didn't even roll his eyes at Tala. He just nodded and went into the kitchen; it would take a while to make.

Twenty, yes twenty, minutes later found Kai coming back out with a huge sandwich sure to please. He handed it to Tala and just stood there, waiting.

"Could you please not stare at me?"

"Eat it." Kai commanded in his mechanical voice.

When Tala saw his eyes flash, he knew Kai should be obeyed...

Plus, he was hungry. So he took a bite, expecting heaven. He thought it was, until he tasted...

Cabbage. The redhead hates cabbage. Not only the taste, but an incident involving cabbage as well.

~_**Inner Flashback**_~

_Tala felt a little hungry. The 6 year old went into the kitchen and found his mom in there._

_"Mommy, I'm hungry."_

_"Ok, what do you want?"_

_He grinned widely. "A sanwich please." (A/N: Sanwich is not a typo. Thank you for understanding.)_

_"Ok darling. Today, I m going to give you cabbage on it."_

_"Why?" He inquires, eyes full of wonder._

_"Because you're a big boy now, and big boys eat cabbage."_

_"Really? You think I'm a big boy?" Toothy grin ensues._

_"Yes baby. Now, excuse me while I get it out, ok?"_

_He nodded and moved out of mommy's way. He watched in fascination and horror as she struggled to pull out something round and green. He sure hoped it would taste better than it looked._

_It looked like mommy finally got it out of the fridge. But he saw a look of horror cross her face immediately after freeing it._

_Next thing he knew, it was flying at him. With no signs of slowing or stopping. He saw black for a while._

_When he opened his eyes, he looked around the white room. __Am I dead?_

_Then a nurse and doctor walked through the door. __What happened?_

_The nurse told him what happened, and that he had gotten stitches. He just nodded._

_"Can I see my mom?"_

_She was sent in. "Oh, my baby! Are you ok?"_

_"I'm good now."_

_"Don't worry... I won't make you eat cabbage, ok?"_

_**End of Inner Flashback**_

He shuddered at this memory. Why does that have to come up each time he eats cabbage?

"Kai."

"Yes?"

"Why did you put cabbage in my sandwich?"

"I didn't"

"Then why is it there?"

"I don't know. Maybe it just flew right in."

That was said in sarcasm, but Tala suspected it was closer to the truth than Kai thought. Cabbage has been out to get him, clearly, since the age of six. He's lasted this long, but that means nothing to the produce.

"Could you... make me another one? Without the cabbage?"

"Fine." The answer held no emotion, not even annoyance.

Kai disappeared into the kitchen yet again.

When he came out this time, the sandwich was fine. In fact, better than Spencer's version. It was as if a secret additional ingredient was added. Whatever it was, it tasted good. Looking at Kai, he saw a hint of a smirk carved on his face.

~**End Flashback**~

Tala sighed. He wondered what was taking so long. He was hungry dammit! He went into the kitchen to see Kai on the floor, and cabbage everywhere. No further explanation was needed. He ran over to him. "Kai! Kai! Are you ok!?"

He frantically went to his cell phone to call 911.

As he was dialing however, Kai said, "Hang up the phone."

"But you've been ambushed by cabbage! This is a serious matter!"

Kai got up suddenly, inhumanly fast, and took the phone from him. He crushed it in his bare hand. Tala watched in shock as his phone fell like dust to the floor.

"H-how did you do that?" His voice reflected his horror.

"I told you to hang up."

Ok then. "Anyway... um, how's my sandwich coming along?"

He wondered why Kai slapped his hand to his forehead.

~Meanwhile~

The bladebreakers surrounded Chief's almighty laptop, watching intently. It was not a beybattle they were watching however.

Kai rolled his eyes. "How much longer will this take?" He wanted to trick Tala, but he's a busy man. Impatient perhaps?

"Not too much longer Kai. Don't worry."

Kai woke up with a need to play a trick on a certain redhead. He had an idea, but unfortunately, not the skills needed to pull it off.

So he went to Kenny and stated, "I need you to do something for me."

"Sure Kai, what?"

He exhaled knowing how ridiculous it sounded. "I need you to make a robot that looks just like me."

"Oh, because of the fangirls?"

He hadn't thought of that. He'll keep it around for those situations. "Uh, not quite." He then confided what he planned to do.

Kenny had not only agreed to it, he finished in under a couple of hours.

Kai had remembered Tala's fear of cabbage. He smirked, knowing exactly what the robot would ask: "Would you like a sandwich?"

His plan had been going perfect. It was just taking so damn long. At least it was almost time to reveal the joke to the redhead.

He smirked some more. This should be good.

~Tala POV~

"I give up." Kai announced, emotionless.

"What?"

"You can make your own damn sandwich. I'm outta here."

"Wait Kai!" He reaches out to grab Kai's arm. The arm is much harder than he expected. Again, almost inhuman-like. There have been signs of something fishy going on, and he's going to get to the bottom of this. Once and for all.

"Kai."

"Let go."

"What's going on? Hm?" Tala still had a grip on the arm. "Tell me."

"You really want to know?"

"Yes."

"Then brace yourself." He released himself from Tala's grasp, and lifted the back of his shirt.

There was a power switch.

"What the hell?! You're a robot! Where's the real Kai?"

"Probably laughing his ass off at you right now."

Great. So I've just been tricked by the one and only Kai. For a few days. Great.

"Ok, Robot Kai, just one question."

"What?"

"What did you put in my sandwiches? It tasted really good."

"What, my additional ingredient?"

"Yeah, that one. What was it?"

"Cabbage."

* * *

_**A/N**__: ... This just started out with the idea that Tala was hungry. And the title. The rest popped up along the way O.o_

_So, please tell me if you said "wtf?" too! xD Oh, and if it was humorous at all. Please stab the green button nearby and leave me great words to remember you by! :D_

_Peace!_

_chocolatexloverx16_


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